This snippet comes from Berna, over in County Kildare (and, for sound effects, a youtube to follow):
The Lazy Feckers
Birds in their little nests agree, but not the ones who visit my bird feeder.
I haven’t taken the time to look up the names of the small brown birds who come each day – first one, then two or three more – then the flock. They behave disgracefully, knocking each other out of the way, pushing and shoving like women at a winter sale in Macy’s, NY.
I asked my brother what they were called. I said that I thought they were sparrows. His response was, “Those are a bunch of Lazy Feckers as far as I’m concerned. Aren’t the hedges full of berries and the fields full of grain for them?”
But I enjoy their visits and feed my Lazy Feckers every day. Some day soon they will be gone and I will miss their confusion of birds. I’m waiting for robins to show up but haven’t seen one this year.
The poor old fat pigeons can’t eat from the feeder but gladly peck at the seeds that fall from the Lazy Feckers’ beaks.
PS: I’ve since been told that they are Starlings.
Ah, Berna — but do they murmur?
The collective term for a bunch of lazy f — um, starlings — is A Murmuration of Starlings.
And they do, they do: check out this youtube of Damar the Starling: